One Month

One month ago today, I was scrambling about the apartment in Manchester, packing, re-packing and getting ready to leave for the airport.  Here I am tucked in a corner of a pub, one month later - finally having found a place in Chiswick that I can access internet until mine is installed.  I have a flat, a job, and I am now experiencing the actuality of the little dream I had a year ago (longer than that really, but the plan started to form structure a year ago).  Before I go into the particulars of being here, I must first appreciate how completely lucky I am to be able to do this.

For the time being, I am treating this adventure as I try to treat life (in my better, take-the-high-road moments) - as each day comes.  There are moments in each day that are beautiful, odd, mildly extraordinary, fascinating, irritating, exhausting, etc. I learn at least 10 things each day - which is a lot for me - and this is DAILY.  I also have this weird sense that nothing about this journey is an accident.  I have this continuous feeling that every step along this path is as it is supposed to be.  I can't think of another time in my life where I have felt so solidly in belief of intention, the connectedness of things, etc..  Is this faith at work?  Or is it my mind attempting to rationalize experiences to reduce my sense of overwhelm and distance?  Either way, it is my current thought....  Examples are below (sort of)..

I have a policy of accepting any offer of something to do - borrowed from one Mrs. Kate Waldo-Fillion, whether I feel like it in the moment or not.  For example, last Saturday I received a phone call from a new colleague inviting me to a photography exhibit of London street photography through the ages at the Museum of London.  I definitely wanted to see this exhibit, but had planned my day much differently.  I scrapped my plans and went. It was great.  So, I've talked about my flat - it is great, in an amazing location, and happens to sit between a pilates studio, and the town hall which holds zumba classes each week.  I didn't realize this when I moved in.  There is no excuse to not work out my body issues and get back into my body through these things.  I don't feel that this is an accident.  I went to my first zumba class on Tuesday, and loved every minute of it.  The class ended with the Tina Turner version of Proud Mary.  I felt my mom right there with me - dancing.

This is not to say that there have not been moments so far that have truly made me questions my sanity in moving so far away from people and animals I love and miss dearly.  Part of me wonders if part of this is a further measure to try to escape the cold and silent realities of having lost two people I couldn't imagine my life without, in as many years.  Here I am, 3000 miles away from the geographical locations in which I knew and loved these people (mom and Burg of course) - and they are still gone.  If anything, I feel them both more here.  How strange is that?

But also, and equally as important; I wanted to experience something, or some place that would hep me expand and grow.  I forgot that growth is sometimes painful, inconvenient, hard, and totally undesirable in the face of familiarity - even if that familiarity isn't necessarily good or healthy.  That plus a new culture - which IS different from the US.  I am clearly an American here - from my manner of speaking to my way of relating in the world.  I am intrigued by how embracing these differences will help me grow and expand - and I don't know how that will happen yet.

The school is interesting and great in many ways, and imperfect in many ways.  The students and my colleagues are really interesting and diverse though and they all have so far been great and have helped ease the transition.  More about that later...

So, one month down - onto the next!  Thank you all for telling me what makes home "home" to you.  The art, plants, and color are slowly progressing - the person and dogs will take a little more time...

Always love,
J